This may be a little cold

Typically, when you’re scheduled for an ultrasound and you’re laying out on the table, you will receive a verbal warning: “This may be a little cold.”

I didn’t receive any warning as the thick gel was slathered across my neck. It was a little startling even though I knew what was coming. Bodily reactions are strange to me. My mind knew to warn my muscles not to flinch, and yet, I flinched.

I have nodules on my thyroid. Most doctors treat this very mildly. They do not act with haste or even concern. However, considering thyroid cancer runs in my family, to me, it is concerning. I tend not to think about it too often but when I have these tests done, it’s hard not to.

If no new nodules form and if my existing nodules do not grow in size, they are in no way going to push for a biopsy. The whole thing is a waiting game. I’ve had two biopsies in the past, both negative and I’m thankful for that. However, the percentage of tissue that is actually tested is a tiny fraction compared to the entire organ. There is always a chance I’m just living with cancer cells that have not yet decided to destroy me.

Now, I suppose you can say that about any organ in the body. That our bodies as a whole run a huge risk of hosting cancer at some point. Sadly, that doesn’t make me feel any better about my situation.

The alternative is to have the whole thyroid removed. Most doctors do not recommend this path and I can understand why. Any surgery runs a risk and once the thyroid is removed you will relay on medication for the rest of your life.

I think I’ll be fine until I’m not. Currently I’m not freaking out. I’m listening to my gut, or trying to. Maybe in a year I will feel differently but for now we are just monitoring my thyroid conditions. If you suffer from any thyroid issues you know how draining they can be. I’m no expert but I can certainly listen to anyone who wants to rant or talk about their concerns.